Develop confidence to excel in life, exhorts Dr. Maryam, as she charts her story and provides tips to motivate women.
Oman has proven to be a torchbearer with its progressive policies and practices that ensure women enjoy equal rights. A dedicated ‘Oman Women’s Day’ (October 17) is a case in point, maintains Dr. Maryam Tubelieh, a multi-disciplinary dentist, who has followed her passion for training and motivation following the incorporation of quality management and service development qualifications into her growing portfolio of competencies.
She is currently the Head of Innovation Section in the Directorate General of Quality Assurance Centre (DGQAC) in the Ministry of Health in Oman. DGQAC is a facilitating body for promoting and managing quality, plus performance improvement in the healthcare service.
She attributes her confidence level and happiness quotient to her successful shift towards quality management, which was further reinforced by her volunteering jobs in departments related to quality and accreditation bodies such as the Joint Commission International (JCI). It sparked in her an interest to add value to staff development by being a part of the change for a better work environment.
In her diverse career path she found her passion in training; she aspired to become a global trainer and motivational speaker, despite her severe stage fright. She realised the importance of training to be able to influence change and got introduced to Toastmasters Club, which was her second turning point; it honed her public speaking and leadership skills in an uplifting environment. Soon, her fears and anxieties became her strength and motivation that allowed her to grab opportunities that she only dreamed of earlier. One of which was an invitation to be key speaker at the Arab Health Conference and another at AEEDC (dental conference); following that, many more rolled her way. Over the years, she has strengthened her skills through training programmes on a variety of topics.
However, when health became a concern, she put a pause on her workaholic life after realising success in a weak body is not worth it. Health is Happiness. She started attending health retreats and wellness courses abroad, which made her realise the importance of the holistic healing of the body, which includes body, mind and soul – all interlaced; the soul being the ultimate healer. If the soul is nourished, the rest will be guided to be healthy, which was also the teachings of the Prophet Mohammed (PBUH). Another important realisation was the importance of prevention versus cure and how good quality supplements and food intake could be a good investment.
“That was another turning point in my life,” she points out, adding that now she is well placed on the path of her dream, which is to “help improve the quality of life for people of all ages, races and religions.”
Personally, she says she has been strongly inspired by three people in her life: her mother through her dedication, Oprah Winfrey by becoming a beacon of hope and Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) with his wise leadership and valuable teachings, summed in the book ‘The Sealed Nectar.’
Calling her mother a legend, she points out that she fulfilled her ambition to be a woman of impact by the various roles she played. “She was a great teacher, a mother who managed the household after work and raised us four girls and one boy to be unique in our fields with confidence. She was and is a walking school… She inspires me to always want to be better and to never give up,” says Dr. Maryam, adding that her dad was equally a hero for supporting them and giving her mom the freedom to be the woman she wished to be.
With aspirations to become global and an ambition that is limited only by the sky, she talks about women in the modern society in the following interview.
What are the attributes that define a successful woman in our society?
For me, being successful means being happy with the life one is living or choosing to live. Happiness can only be achieved when we can fulfil our needs physically, mentally and spiritually, whereby we balance between practising our spiritual rituals, leading a healthy lifestyle, upholding our duties as family members and continuously developing our skills to achieve our goals. A very helpful guide of how to achieve your dreams and be connected with family could be ‘The One Thing’ by Gary Keller.
Is our society better equipped to address the International Women’s Day’s theme of better gender balance?
I think we as a society are on the right track compared to other nations. It has been firmly established by our leadership from the beginning of the Renaissance; His Majesty Sultan Qaboos bin Said emphasised the importance of female education alongside their male brothers and took it further by empowering women in the country with major leadership positions. Together with following the teachings of the Creator (Allah), who gave a more profound and beautiful understanding to gender equality, Oman I would say stands along with developed countries in ensuring better gender balance.
What is needed to drive women to excel in their chosen careers?
What is required is a strong belief in herself and her dreams. She should be coachable and teachable, should be willing to share knowledge and experience, work hard and should be free of ego and full of love.
How can we teach the values of empowering girls from early childhood?
When we as parents, teachers and leaders realise that the girl child will be responsible for bringing up the next generation, a generation that will lead humanity, we will then realise that investing in her education and capacity building is as important as investing in the boy. We should raise her knowing her true worth, and understanding her big role in the community. Plus, help her develop confidence and find her passion to excel and shine.
She should be encouraged to read books and to take part in voluntary activities; voluntary work aids in developing skills of team work and leadership.
Any tips and guidelines to motivate women and build confidence?
- Understand that you are equal with men in the sight of God, but you are not the same in nature, therefore don’t get out of your way and harm yourself just to prove you are better. Women complement men and vice versa, with that understanding harmony, will be achieved
- Believe in yourself and your worth: you are worthy of love, worthy of respect, worthy to have dreams, worthy of being treated like a queen. Don’t accept to live being treated less than that, whatever be your circumstances or background.
- Know your purpose, rights and responsibility, whether through the divine doctrine from The Creator that preserves rights of women in a script that is flawless and just (Quraan), or the national and international by-laws – depends on what you believe.
- Never give up on your dreams, because it is never too late. Managing your time and planning ahead could be a good start. To quote Steven Covey from his book ‘The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People’, “Start with the end in mind”.
- Always remember that each one is the source of his/her happiness and love, despite what one goes through. Read enlightening books like ‘The 18 Rules Of Happiness’ by Karle Moore and ‘The Rules of Love’ by Richard Templar.
- Be a dominant force of good on this earth; don’t settle until you influence change that will create a better future for your children and grandchildren, because your ultimate purpose is to be a Mother (not necessarily of your own kids).